Misapplied Tongue Pride

It's too bad that stupidity isn't painful. I came across two fairly appalling facts the other day.

One was that a supermarket chain in England has insured the tongue of its chief wine buyer for more than $17 million dollars. (We are currently researching the possibility of offering tongue insurance through Guy du Vin, for wine tasting purposes only, of course.) I couldn't help but wonder, is there special significance to the number $17 million? Why not a round number like $20 or $25 million?

If I were to insure any particular body part, my tongue would not be my first choice. If we were talking about wine, I would insure my nose, as most of what we experience as taste is really related to our sense of smell. But if we were talking about anything really important, there is at least one other area that lays claim to having first priority. And believe me, $17 million is NOT enough!!!

The other appalling fact is that the single largest purchaser of fine wine in the U.S. is Costco. In the words of H.L. Mencken "No one ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public." It gives me a warm feeling to know that every one of the half million bottles of Merlot or Cabernet or Chardonnay sitting on their shelves were lovingly "hand-crafted" at all those "fine wine" factories located in a wine region near you. Enjoy!

On to better topics: Temperature and wine

The volatility of wine odors increases when wine is warm. (This means that you can smell more of the odors in your wine when it is warm than when it is cold.) Serving the same wine at two different temperatures is like serving two completely different wines.

Wines that are aromatic, and rich in acid and fruit are better drunk on the chilled side of things. White wines would be good examples as they are low in perceptible tannins. (Tannin is more obvious at colder temperatures.) Rosé wines can be slightly warmer, but still should be cool. Young, light reds with lots of fresh fruit can also be enjoyed with a slight chill on them. Wines with tannin and a complex bouquet are best at warmer temperatures. Most red wines fit this category. Even temperature variations as small as 2 degrees can change the way a wine is perceived.

At temperatures below 43 deg. F:
• bouquet and aroma tend to disappear
• saltiness is accentuated
• bitterness is more evident
• acidity is more prominent
• sweetness is lowered
• body is difficult to determine

  At temperatures above 68 deg F:

• alcohol is strongly emphasized
• wine is perceived as having more body
• sweetness becomes more intense

The optimum temperatures for wine (and they vary for each wine) are between 56 deg F and 63 deg F. I don't recommend carrying a little wine glass thermometer around with you, as I assume you would like to keep your friends and continue being invited to parties. But I do recommend that you pay more attention to the wine you are drinking. Temperature can play a significant role in your enjoyment of any wine and it is fun to experiment with the same wine at various temperatures. My only hard and fast rule is that you avoid any wine that has the words "Serve well chilled" printed on the label. Chances are you won't like it as it warms up. The only wine that absolutely MUST be icy cold is Champagne - to slow the bubbles down a bit. And speaking of Champagne, I think I hear a small, bubbly voice calling to me from the refrigerator.